...mich...

hey..it's the time of the day/year/mth/week....i m feeling lousy about everything again..how sianz it must be for everyone who actually reads this thing...anyway..was just thinking if i m actually a very difficult person to hang ard with, to live with..n if i would feel better abt everything if i was staying alone with myself...sighz...so many thoughts just flying ard in my head..n it's all just qn that i don't have the answers for...i mean like i keep feeling if i m taken for granted by pple..i know i take pple for granted...i try not to do that anymroe..seriously!!...i love n appreciate all of my frens.....but i wonder if they say the same thing..everyone has frens all over..but somehow..i m hanging on to those at home..they r the one who matters the most to me..i mean..i will make frens/acquaintances here...n after a while..it's like they were pple i once knew..it's sad..really..n like others can still keep in touch n hang out n everything...it scares me!!..really..i know that i haven't emailed or anything in a long time..but seriously...a lot of pple hasn't too...n it really saddens me..to think that all i do at the comp in sch now is just for official stuff..check school email, applications...no more personal things like email that i have to type, have to reply, frens that i have to love...no more...no more...i wonder if my life will b that way for a long time to come..just me all alone..n this isn't even abt finding love...cuz i m screwed up in that area n it's just that i know it will never happen to someone like me...sighz...it's like there's this fren from my 1st yr...he's here now..but somehow..my other fren has more things to say to him than i do n i was closer to him then...so i start to wonder..if it's just me..really..i m thinking of pple at home all the time..my family n frens...but sometimes if they r too....sorry!!...aniwaes..not a good thing to continue.......to pple who know who they r..i love u guys always....=p 262002 - 2308hr