resting mich...

it's been a while since i last felt so dead..really..i had an afternoon paper yesterday n another one this morning..the paper yest was supposed to be easy..but i have no idea how..my lecturer managed to make it difficult...n the one this morning is supposed to be a killer and a huge burden on everyone's mind..turned out to be really ok..hmm...how interesting...have really no idea how all of these work..but i m still stuck in the library...studying away for the rest of my papers which is like next wk n the wk after...quite sianz though..hmm..oh..interesting info...it's the queen's golden jubilee this yr..her 50th yr as the queen..so like on mon n tues..it's public holiday n like the procession will pass by the school...so we had a notice from the school admin..warning us not to attempt to go up to the roofs to get a clearer view..if not..we will be regarded as a suspect by the police..quite funny rite?..heh..aniwaez...=p..1843hr - 280502

bursting brain..

hey..it's been a while since i last left a blog..feel bad but like just don't seem to have the time or the discipline to do it..it's very irritating actually..like when i walk to school..i sometimes plan like what i would like to finish and to do for the day..but like don't seem to finish a lot of them..which is super irritating...heh..yups..aniwaes..exams for me will start in like 5 days time...quite exciting..i must say that i m a lot more prepared than i was last yr..n i m glad for it..really...it's like everything's seems to be falling into place which is gd..i guess..but it also means that i m expecting a lot for myself..which is added stress..but i really m not stress now..heh..gdgd..yups..was doing past yr paper just now...for linear algebra..n i got really really bored..seriously!!!...never b4...but my handwriting went from bad to worse..piangz...hahaha...yups..just to leave a note n ask..so how's life?..take care..=P..2043hr - 240502

crying mich...

dunno exactly wat hit me..but i was just sitting in a little cornercorner of my room n tearing/crying for like 1/2 hr..i felt a lot better after that..but i really dunno wat happened...i m rather stressed abt the subject i m studying now..'survival models'..the subj title enough to scare most pple away..dunno wat's wrong with me..n like i studied it both yest n today..n like both days..there's this equation that i can't seem to derive..yups..i do things like that..anyway..so i was really frustrated n really on the brink of giving up everything..so i just decided to lock my door..blast my music n just sit there...so like work got out of my mind..but other things came into the pict...namely the fact that i won't be going home soon..hit me quite bad i must say..n i just started crying...hmm..now my eyes r really tired n i know it's going to swell up tmr...but still...i dunno..i felt that i have been controlling these tears for quite some time already..n like when it finally came..i dunno..i couldn't n didn't want to stop it..sighz..yups..aniwaes..feeling tons better now...will continue with my battle with survival tmr..but like i think work is the thing that has been keeping my mind occupied..such that i don't think unnecessarily..so when i try to get work out of my mind..other things surface..sighz....=p..0149hr - 12052002

mich with a mission..

just want to say thanks to everyone..for their wishes n love..it means a lot to me..n i m really happy that all these events r starting to make sense now..a bit slow..but wat's new rite?..=p..yups..n also..this is just a msg to a dear dear fren..iv..i really really hope that u r feeling better..abt life..abt urself..abt ur frens..abt everything k?...i know that i really am not good at giving advice or good at telling u how u should think or good at teaching u the facts of life..coz seriously..i m so not the person to be talking to...=p..but wat i know is just the fact that things don't go the way we want..all the time actually..but hey..love from me to u...that's one thing is for certain k??..just keep that thought in mind yar?..love u darling..=p..if anything..just drop me a mail..online or anything..coz i know how to listen but all i can say after that is that life's up to u dear..how u choose things are really up to u..but watever u choose..i will be really supportive!!...jia you...=p..i haven't really been studying much..but got everything pretty much planned out..so that's a gd thing..have to really get down to serious work soon...but somehow..i m not that stressed yet..which is not too gd a thing..hmm..aniwaes..for everyone who actually reads this..best of luck for everything..n that i love my frens for loving me as i m.!!!...=p 1744hr - 040502

dazed mich...

hmm..i just got this blog deleted actually..didn't realise that it was happening..but i shall recap...=p...first...HAPPY BIRTHDAY YANQING..finally..in the same league as yixin now..how u feeling??..well..feeling really dazed now..doing stuff that r just daily routines..n not actions through thoughts..n that scares me a bit..yups..dazed coz used too much energy today..went to the gym in the morning..after the shocking news..of me..of all pple..getting an internship..i think that my reaction was really slow..coz i was still really calm talking to the lady in charge..n then..afterwards..i felt this adrenaline rush..so i went to run..i knew that if i acted on the adrenaline rush..i wouldn't have gotten anything done today...yups..i would have ran to the library..to the 3rd floor..n like screamed to my frens there n made a scene..n get us thrown out in the process..=p..nopes..i had the time to think abt wat this actually meant to me..i know that it's a gd thing...really..i m not stupid...but it's the contradiction between the mind n the heart again...i mean..i have been looking forward to going home all yr..i m so happy when i finally got the luxury of booking a ticket home on the 26th june..and all that thoughts of me going home on that day now is gone..i have to go home only on the 2nd sept..sighz..things that u have been looking forward to n now being extended further n further away from u is a very sad thing...hmm..but i keep telling myself..' jian qiang yi dian..mei wen ti de..jia you'..i really hope that i will listen to myself..really!!!..it's so frustrating to be contradicting urself...but i will get through this...i will!!!...miss u all!!!...=p 0128 hr - 010502